Under Sunless Skies (Starlight Saga Book 2) Read online

  “You’re saying she was like a test tube baby?”

  Hayden nods. “Years ago, my mother was employed at one of Sector Thirteen’s labs in San Francisco and worked for a man named Doctor Krilova. She and a group of other geneticists were researching new ways of using Zeta DNA to develop medical treatments for diseases such as Parkinsons and Alzheimers.” He folds his brawny arms over his chest, stretching the thin material of his T-shirt. “But things went south, when Doctor Krilova broke protocol and added some human and animal DNA into the Zeta genepool-mix. Afterwards, the experiment was surprisingly successful and produced a female hybrid, composed of human, animal, and alien genes.”

  “So besides making super soldiers, Sector Thirteen is using Zeta genes to create other things? Like those reapers?” Nausea swims through my stomach. “Is that even legal?”

  “I doubt it. They’ve used the Zeta DNA on numerous groundbreaking experimentations.” Hayden presses his lips into a firm line, then continues in a dark tone, “Delta was a scientific marvel, until she started to rebel. As she grew older, she told me that she wanted to see the outside world. She just wanted her freedom, and when she refused to submit to any more tests, Doctor Krilova decided to terminate her.”

  I gasp. “You mean kill her? Why?”

  “I get the feeling that no one challenges or disobeys him. Lucky for Delta, my mother took pity on the creature and offered to take her home. Since her body contained numerous biochemical compounds that could benefit their research, my mother said they would do further analysis and provide Delta with a chance to live outside the lab in a somewhat controlled environment.”

  I touch his arm. “That doesn’t explain how it was your fault that she disappeared.”

  He sniffles and turns his head. “Delta was curious about teleportation, so I took her to an amusement park…” He pauses, and tension seems to stiffen the muscles in his neck and shoulders. “Back then, I didn’t know the residue left behind from our abilities would stick to human skin. It doesn’t stick to a full-blooded Meleah because it’s part of us already. Delta must’ve had more human DNA, like you. The next day she vanished.”

  “What do you think happened?”

  “I think ST tracked her down and returned her to the lab for termination.” He hangs his head, the corners of his mouth tipping downward. “They were always threatening to do it, but my parents managed to talk them out of it every time. Maybe ST grew tired of the excuses and finally took her.”

  I scoot over on the sofa until I’m closer to Hayden. I lean forward and stare into his eyes, his expression heartbreaking. Touching each side of his face with my hands, I caress his jaw with my thumbs. “I’m sorry about Delta, but you’re not to blame.”

  He turns away quickly, and I drop my hands.

  “I’m glad you told me about your sister even though it was hard. Now I’m starting to wonder her disappearance is somehow linked to my attack.”

  He shifts in his seat to face me, then grips my shoulders. “This whole mess with Xavier, it’s shredding my insides.” I struggle to pull away from him, but his hold tightens. “I-I have something to say, and I practiced this in my head on the drive over, so please hear me out.”

  “Hayden—”

  “I know I’m screwed up.” His hands slide to grasp my upper arms. “I’m moody and indecisive, and not being with you is killing me. And I’m so confused and I don’t know what to do or how to fix things between us.”

  “None it is your responsibility, and I’m much tougher than I look—”

  “I won’t let anyone hurt you, I promise.” He takes a few deep breaths, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m trying to do the right thing, but I keep effing it up with my impulsiveness. I know I don’t deserve you…but you have to know you’re everything to me.” He stares into my eyes. “Can you please forgive me?”

  Nodding, I give him a hug, wrapping my arms tight around him. “I’m sorry about Delta. It sounds like you really cared about her.”

  He leans back. “I did. She was a sweet kid. You would’ve liked her.”

  “Why is everyone so sure that she’s dead?”

  His shoulders stiffen. “Please drop it.” His voice is tense as if taut with frustration. “Delta is gone.”

  I stroke his arm. “Maybe Sector Thirteen just has her locked in one of their ultra sinister labs—”

  “Can we please change the subject?”

  He slams his lips onto mine, and I grip his shirt in my fists, pulling him into me. I kiss him back, touching the sinewy muscles on his arms, then burrowing my hands under his T-shirt. My fingers slide over the hard flesh of his quivering abs, and slip around his waist to caress his back. I inhale his spicy, soapy scent, my pulse in my throat. His hipbone presses against my waist. He holds me so tight that it’s almost difficult to breathe. The warmth from his lips travels all the way to my toes, and he deepens the kiss, hard and eager. Something stirs deep inside me, filling me with heat.

  When he pulls back, we’re both breathless and red-faced.

  “What was that all about?” I ask.

  “I feel lost without you, Peaches.” The worry lines deepen along his forehead. “We shouldn’t keep torturing ourselves like this…” His voice is deep and husky. “But the hell with right or wrong. Because whenever I look into your eyes, I see the rest of my life, and I see it with you, Sloane.” He brushes his knuckles softly against the side of my face. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Delta.”

  “So…kissing is your way of apologizing?”

  He nods. “Yes.”

  Smiling, I pat his thigh. “Then I accept. You’re forgiven.”

  “I don’t really deserve it, though.” His gaze becomes hooded, his mouth a hard impassive line. “I try to protect you, although it feels like I keep failing.”

  I straighten my shoulders. “What do you mean? You do a good job of keeping me safe.”

  “But I can’t shield you from all the Meleah political nonsense.” He tugs at the collar of his shirt and sighs. “But you’re caught up in it anyway now.”

  I touch his forearm, his muscles taut beneath my hand. “None of that matters now because I’m one of you, right?”

  “Yeah, sort of…” he mumbles.

  Another uneasy silence claims the room, broken only by the ticking of the wall clock.

  My mouth goes dry. I stride into the kitchen to get a drink. Hayden follows me and stands in the doorway. I open the fridge, take out a pitcher, and set the container on the counter, then go to the cabinets and take out two glasses and fill them with the Kool-Aid. I hand one to Hayden and sit on a stool at the center island. Hayden watches me intently, taking a sip of his drink.

  After a few gulps, I peer at him over the rim of the glass. “Why are you staring at me like that?”

  Hayden steps closer and places his glass on the counter. He rests his hands on my shoulders, the warmth of his fingers soaking into my skin. “You haven’t mentioned the attack or talked about it in a while,” he says softly. “Are you all right? Are you sleeping?”

  “Are you implying that I look like shit?” I lower my head, then move away from him, putting my empty glass in the sink. “Some nights I still have nightmares, but I’m handling it.”

  “Truthfully?” His tone is laced with disbelief.

  When I don’t answer or look at him, he crosses the space between us.

  He gently lifts my chin. “You can talk to me. I can tell you’re not fine. Some lunatic tried to kill you, so you don’t have to be okay. You can be pissed off or scared…or whatever else. You’ve been through a lot the last month or so.”

  His words seep through me and I squirm away from him. “I don’t get to be emotional. Not yet,” I say. “I need to stay strong to keep my family safe.”

  “That’s not healthy. If you keep all this shit buried inside, then one day you’ll just explode, kinda like you did in Mrs. Brook’s class.”

  “I already apologized to the teacher. Right now, th
e focus needs to be on finding Xavier and those reapers before anyone else gets hurt.”

  He grumbles under his breath. “I realize that.”

  “Then what’ve you heard?” I ask. “Any updates from Arcane on the reaper situation?”

  “No.” Hayden shoves his hands into his jeans pockets and studies me for a moment. “All I’m saying is that I’m here for you.” His voice is low, and he’s gazing at me with those smoldering eyes as if he can peer into my soul.

  “While I’m grateful that you like to play bodyguard,” I say. “What I really need is those reapers euthanized. And discover what Sector Thirteen is doing on the island. If they’re looking for my dad, then I need to know so I can warn him.”

  “All I know from my parents and Arcane is that ST is here to set up a new lab on the island to do some type of research, but on what, well, the details are a bit vague…” He pauses as if gathering his thoughts. “Safety is becoming an illusion in Grimm Haven, and I’ll do everything in my power to keep you and your family safe.”

  I raise a shaky hand to my brow and push the hair from my eyes. “One way to do that would be to stop leaving your residue on me.”

  “I know! Damn, I’m screwing everything up for us.” Hayden sighs. “I think we need a change of scenery.” He circles an arm around my waist and his breath warms my neck. “Let’s get out of here.”

  NINETEEN

  Hayden wiggles his eyebrows. “So you up for a change of scenery, Peaches?”

  Taking a break from all the Sector Thirteen drama sounds like a great idea. I can always dwell on how unfair life has become later, like when I’m lying in bed and not sleeping.

  “Are you sure we don’t need celestial approval? Or a chaperone?” I tease.

  “This isn’t Amish country. Teens usually go on dates alone.” His deep chuckle sends a hot shiver along my spine and he leans in, kissing my cheek. “We’ll keep this outing casual, no pressure.”

  “Is it safe?” I ask.

  He smirks. “It’s the third Tuesday of the month, that’s when Sector Thirteen has their staff meetings.”

  I roll my eyes. “Good to know.”

  “Come on.” He grabs my hand. “I’ve got food. You like chocolate, right?”

  “As much as my need for oxygen.”

  The foodie in me has my butt sliding off the stool in my kitchen and following him out the front door before my rational-self can protest.

  Outside, the setting sun tints the cloudy sky with a combination of fiery red and flaming orange hues. Hayden guides me to his Range Rover, then opens the car door for me. We’re both quiet while listening to the radio as he drives us to my favorite hangout, Shadowland Memorial Cemetery.

  After we park and get out, Hayden goes around the back of the SUV to grab a plaid blanket and a backpack. “After I got your text, I thought it might be nice to do something normal. You hungry?”

  “Always.” I nod with a goofy smile. “A picnic in the cemetery is definitely my kind of normal.”

  “I thought you’d like it. Nothing gets a cute girl hot-and-bothered like a creepily romantic setting.”

  I laugh. “A fun outing in a graveyard? Total bonus points. When it comes to wooing, you know my weaknesses.”

  Hayden opens the backdoor and reaches inside the car to grab his Army jacket. Facing me again, he drapes it around me. His hands linger on my shoulders and my stomach does a crazy backflip, but I’m not sure whether it’s a combo of nerves or my undeniable chemistry with Hayden. He shifts the backpack from one shoulder to the other, then takes my hand.

  Slipping through the rusty gates, Hayden steps onto the worn path. “No one will be looking for us here. Not even the reapers. The stench of death will overpower any residue, so we’ll be safe.”

  The fading sunlight illuminates the footpath, the golden rays glinting dully off the tombstones. We wander through rows of tombstones until he halts near a mausoleum and a tall oak, where he lays the blanket on the grass. He kneels to open the basket, and removes the contents: sandwiches, apple slices, slices of cheese, pieces of chocolate, and two bottles of soda.

  Sitting on the cloth, I scan all the food. “This is great.”

  He tilts his head and regards me intently. “It’s my way of trying to make up for everything.”

  I grab an apple slice. “Hmm, well, it’s a good start.”

  We devour the food and drink the sodas, while enjoying the morbid scenery. With the waning light slicing over his profile and the rest of him cast in deep shadows, he doesn’t seem real. Hayden’s shoulder brushes mine, and I catch a whiff of his skin, a spicy trace of something masculine and exotic that causes all my hormones to fire off like crazy.

  “If you could visit any place in the world, where would you go?” he asks.

  “My first stop would be Canada.”

  “If you could visit any place, you’d pick Canada?” He softly chuckles. “Okay, I’ll bite. Why there?”

  “George A. Romero lives in Toronto.”

  “Who’s that? A relative?”

  “I wish! He’s a director, screenwriter, and producer of zombie films.”

  “That doesn’t explain why you’d want to go there.”

  “Duh. To hang with George and learn all his screenwriting secrets.” I tilt my head. “Why’d you pick this place to hang out?”

  “I knew a girl like you wouldn’t be impressed with generic peace offerings like flowers or sappy cards. So I thought a picnic in a graveyard might do the trick.” Hayden removes a package of mini-cupcakes with sprinkles from the backpack. “And I brought your favorite.”

  Warmth spread throughout my chest. “Oh. Wow. You remembered.”

  “I remember everything,” he says softly.

  My pulse flutters and I snatch the cupcakes out of his hand. “Thank you. Very sweet.”

  Unable to meet his eyes, my gaze drops to his chest. The muscles in his arms shift beneath his shirt, as if inviting me to touch his skin. His scent overwhelms my senses, and the warmth from his body invades my personal space. He lifts his hand and sweeps the hair from my neck. My heartbeat accelerates to a jackhammer.

  “Hayden, I wanted to say—”

  “I need to tell you…”

  We stop.

  “Go first.” I wave a hand. “Mine can wait.”

  He clears his throat. “Lately, I’ve been under a lot of pressure from my family.” He blows out a breath, looking extra smoldering against the backdrop of grey headstones and weeping willow trees. “I feel torn in two, and sometimes trying to make everyone happy feels like a losing battle.”

  Dropping my head, I let my hair fall around my shoulders. I glance through the long strands at his face. “You’re in a tough position and I finally get that. I’m sorry that I’ve put so much stress on you, too.”

  “I think it’s been the other way around...I wish I could keep you out of danger, but I know I can’t.”

  “Maybe you could try being a little less noble?”

  “Not sure it’s in my DNA,” he says lightly.

  Chirping crickets fill the air and a long silence edges between us. The wind sways the blades of grass and blooming flowers. The fence outlining the property is warped and sprinkled with rust, like a blood-spattered watchman glowering over its inhabitants.

  I lean back on my palms, staring at the sky. “Why are your parents giving you a hard time?”

  He frowns and presses his lips together. “Please don’t ask me more questions I can’t answer right now. You just have to trust me for now.”

  “That goes both ways. If we’re going to be friends, then you gotta learn to trust me, too.”

  He lowers his head, his eyes never leaving mine until his lashes sweep downward, covering his unique gaze. “Agreed. Okay, so here’s a truth…it feels like I’m cursed.” He grasps my hand, lacing his fingers with mine. “Every time anyone gets close to me, it seems like something bad happens.”

  “You mean like with your sister? And me?”


  “Yes.” His voice sounds hoarse.

  “You’re not to blame for every bad thing that happens to people, Hayden. That’s just a part of life. It sucks, but it’s a fact.”

  “I know.” He closes his eyes, pressing his forehead against mine. “All I want is to keep you from getting hurt, but I suck at it.”

  “No, you’re wrong,” I say breathlessly. “You’re very good at it.”

  Hayden shifts closer and his lips graze my cheek, then he leans back. His gaze travels in a lazy appraisal from my face to my mouth, making my skin warm.

  “God, I wish everything hadn’t gone to shit.” Hayden’s chest rises and falls, his hands clenching at his sides, as if he’s fighting an internal-battle and losing. “I miss you when I’m not with you, and when I’m not with you, all I do is think about you.”

  My breath hitches. “I’ve been so miserable since we broke up. I can’t sleep, enjoy movies, or eat…okay, well, maybe I can still eat.”

  “Believe me, I find it pretty damn impossible not to be with you, too.” His voice breaks on the words, and then he turns away, his jaw tightening.

  I purse my lips. “Why do I suddenly feel like there’s something you’re not telling me?”

  His body goes taut. “Some things might be best on a need-to-know basis for now.”

  More damn secrets. He’s back to evading questions in typical Hayden fashion.

  “A lot of secrets on this island,” I grumble.

  Hayden shakes his head without looking at me. “There certainly is.”

  “You’re beyond infuriating.” I lightly jab him in the side with my elbow. “Do you think I’m made of glass? That I’ll break if you tell me something I might not want to hear?”

  Hayden briefly closes his eyes. “No. I realize you’re a strong person.”

  “Then out with it!”

  He doesn’t respond. For a long moment, he looks devastated, defeated, a boy trapped in his own private hell. I wrap my arms around him in a tight hug to reassure him that everything will be okay, pressing my cheek against his.

  “Why is everything so damn complicated with us?” His voice is low, hushed, his breath stirring my hair.